The question in itself sucks! When we start off our adult life some of us might have wanted to grow up and become a mommy. Others weren’t sure if they wanted to go down the parenting road eventually, however, we end up on the same path. When you pull the goalie and decide to ttc (trying to conceive), it is the most exciting time for us. You imagine how you tell daddy-to-be and think of fun ways to announce your joyful news that you’re pregnant. You think if it’s a boy you will name him this and a girl that. You daydream of decorating the nursery and all the cute socks…NOWHERE do you stop and think will I have trouble conceiving?
I was so cocky coming off birth control and swore it would happen soon if not the same month! Lol. I knew nothing except if there was a sperm in a 5-mile radius I would get knocked up. Not the case. After a few months, I figured it was just the birth control leaving my system. I even had a fertility check-up prior to coming off birth control and was given the all-clear. Haha… Nope! After the one year mark, I went to an OB who did standard labs and said all looked great. However, they referred me to an RE (Reproductive Endocrinologist). This doctor had the bedside manner of a porcupine! With the devastating news that my AMH was very low (age 30) and my FSH was high, the doc said my only option was IVF. Pump the breaks! She didn’t even hand me a tissue and told me to wait out front. That’s when I knew that wasn’t my path-at least not yet! I needed to correct my foundation first. Cant plant a seed in infertile soil! Matthew 13:1-58
Having a holistic approach to life, I knew the answers to my fertility was out there, I just had to find them! I went back to my amazing OB and we did an HSG test(Hysterosalpingography) which showed one fallopian tube blocked. Ok, no big deal! You just need one right? Fast forward 2 years and discovered with repeat HSG that both tubes are wide open and actually conceived same cycle as HSG even though that pregnancy didn’t last I knew I was on the right track. I changed everything about my lifestyle. Supplements, teas, acupuncture OH MY! I read everything I could get my hands on to improve me egg quality and balance hormones. I knew if I could get pregnant once I can do it again. Having a bump squad of family, friends and providers who believe in you and your ability to conceive is critical on this journey. You need to love yourself and trust in your bodies ability to be pregnant. News flash – our bodies actually want to be pregnant! Eventually I found many answers on my quest to parenthood and how to apply them. No one ever asked me about my diet or exercise level, how much wine or coffee I was consuming which is so important because everything affects our hormones, they just saw my labs and shoved pills at me which further caused imbalances.
I learned how to guard my heart and be protective of my emotions. As much as I was so happy for others and their pregnancies it really tore me up inside. I learned that saying NO is ok and not to feel guilty for not attending a baby shower. Over time I started doing things that made me happy and practicing self love. Relaxation and positive thinking are key! Do not let fear run your life! Tell that negative self talk and ‘what if’ monster to take a hike. Whatever makes you happy-do it (without draining the bank). Live every day to the fullest. Life is short so you want to make the most of it and really stop and smell the roses.